The Peacemaker: Chapter 4: Is this really worth fighting over

A man’s wisdom gives him patience;

and it is his glory to overlook an offence.

Proverbs 19:11

In this chapter Mr. Sande gives us some help on making sure this conflict is worth fighting over, and, helping us make sure the log is out of our eye before we try to take the speck out of our opponents eye. This is something I often struggle with so this chapter was a good one!  Here is the summary of his summary of the chapter.

  1. Define the material issues in this conflict.
  2. Define the personal issues in this conflict.
  3. Which personal issues are having the greatest influence on you and your oppenent?
  4. What has the other person done to offend you?
  5. Check your additude;   Have you been gentle, or irritable? What is good about the person involved in your conflict? What principles taought in Scripture do you need to apply in this conflict?
  6. What effect is your conflict having on the onlookers? (coworkers, family, neighbors, church members)
  7. How might overlooking this offense be pleasing to God?
  8. Which of the material issues in Quest. 1 can you simply give in on?

I needed this chapter and will work on using it!


The Peacemaker: Chapter 3

Trust in the Lord and Do Good

I am writing this post as I sniff and sneeze wishing I could be at church with the others… but since I can’t I was able to read and write a review on this chapter today.

For this chapter I’m going to share with you some of the things he said that I found most relevant to me.

“The more you understand God’s love and power, the easier it is to trust him. And the more you trust him, the easier it is to do his will. This is especially true when you are involved in a conflict.”
God is sovereign: He allowed this conflict! He knows it’s happening and is teaching us something through it.
“God is good: He know’s us as a friend, one who loves me; and there is no moment when his eye is off me , or his attention distracted from me.” ~J. I. Packer
“The fact that God is good does not mean that he will insulate us from all suffering. Rather it means he will be with us in our suffering and accomplish good through it.”

When you are involved in a conflict, you to must decide whether or not you will trust in God. Trusting God does not mean believing that he will do all you want, but rather believing that he will do everything he knows is good.

I need to remember that God is good, even when I’m involved in a conflict: I also need to trust him.

The Peacemaker: Chapter Two

This chapter is entitled: “Live at Peace.”  Mr. Sande begins the chapter by giving, “The Three Dimensions of Peace”

Peace With God: “Peace with God does not come automatically. ”

Peace With Others: “In addition to giving you peace with God, Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross opened the way for you to enjoy peace with other people.”

Peace Within Yourself: “Through Jesus you can also experience genuine peace within yourself.”

“God loves peace. From Genesis to Revelation He communicates a deep desire to bless His people with peace and to use them to bring peace to others.” ~Ken Sande

The author also talks about the enemy of peace: Satan, which means “adversary.”  We need to be aware of Satan’s goals so that we will not be led astray from peace.

I’m looking forward to reading the next chapter: I find if I don’t write the review before I start the next chapter I can’t remember everything very well, but it sure is hard not to start the next chapter! I can’t wait for chapter three!

The Peacemaker: Chapter 1

In this chapter Ken Sande shows us the options you have in a conflict. He drew a chart called the “Slippery Slope” that showed the options, I will just try to describe it to you.

Escape Responses                                                                                Peacemaking Responses                                                                            Attack Responses

Suicide –  Flight –  Denial          Overlook – Reconciliation – Negotiation – Mediation – Arbitration – Accountability          Assault –    Litigation – Murder

Think of this as the options you have when facing a conflict. Suicide and murder are obviously the extremes. He looks at each of them and then focuses on the peace making responses

Though it takes him a lot of pages I’ll just let you read the book and find it out yourself :). I will give you the tips and processes that will help me in peacemaking.

Conflict Provides Opportunities!                          In Conflict you should:

Glorify God

Serve Others

Grow to be like Christ

He also gives: “The Four G’s of Peacemaking”

Glorify God: How can I please and honor God in this situation?

Get the log out of your own eye: How can I show Jesus’s work in me by taking responsibility for my contribution to this conflict?

Gently Restore: How can I serve others by helping take their responsibility for their contribution to this conflict?

Go and be Reconciled: How can I demonstrate the forgiveness of God and encourage a reasonable solution to this conflict?

That is only some of the content but it has some great ways to encouraging peace! I really encourage you to read this book!

The Peacemaker, by Ken Sande

The Peacemaker: A Biblical Guide to Resolving Personal Conflict

This is a book I’m going to start reading, it is quite long so I’m going to review every chapter, not just the book as a whole. I may not get all of them done but I’ll try to!

(the picture is copied from Amazon, but you can not click on it.)

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